yoga bitch by suzanne morrison

i picked this up, on a whim, at the airport before boarding one of three flights i was taking to italy. embarrassed, a little, because i haven't read anything so girly in quite a long time - this past year has been all about yoga, and yoga and yoga - much heavier, grown up, serious reading - so this was my popcorn. and it was a great book. well-written, funny, a little cliche in some parts - but it met my expectations and i was glad to have this book as company. "When Suzanne Morrison decides to travel to Bali for a two-month yoga retreat, she wants nothing more than to be transformed from a twenty-five year-old with a crippling fear of death into her enchanting yoga teacher, Indra - a woman who seems to have found it all: love, self, and God. But things don't go quite as expected. Once in Bali, she finds that her beloved yoga teacher and all of her yogamates wake up every morning to drink a large, steaming mug...of their own urine. Sugar is a mortal sin. Spirits inhabit kitchen appliances. And the more she tries to find her higher self, the more she faces her cynical, egomaniacal, cigarette-, wine-, and chocolate-craving lower self." it's funny. chicklit at it's best.

when the heart waits by sue monk kidd

so, for the past several months i feel as i have been dancing around myself, and some big questions keep arising - more than why are we here, what is our purpose - they go deeper then that. i was reading an article on elephant journal and came across a quote from sue monk kidd's book, when the heart waits: spiritual direction for life's sacred questions, and i ordered the book as soon as i could. finally, i thought, someone else had experienced something in the realm of what i feel i am going through - a crisis of spirit. here is the description of the book: "Blending her own experiences with an intimate grasp of contemplative spirituality, Sue Monk Kidd relates the passionate and moving tale of her spiritual crisis at midlife, when life seemed to have lost meaning and how her longing for hasty escape from the pain yielded to a discipline of “active waiting.” Comparing her experience to the formative processes inside a chrysalis on a wintry tree branch, Kidd reflects on the fact that the soul is often symbolized as a butterfly. The simple cocoon, a living parable of waiting, becomes an icon of hope for the transformation that the author sought. Kidd charts her re-ascent from the depths and offers a new understanding of the passage away from the false self, which is based upon others’ expectations, to the true self of God’s unfolding intention. Her wise, inspiring book helps those in doubt and crisis recognize the opportunity to “dismantle old masks and patterns and unfold a deeper, more authentic self.” When the Heart Waits, which first appeared in hardcover in 1990, has been embraced by thousands of spiritual seekers from many backgrounds and has become an enduring classic in Christian spirituality." ok, so yes, the book has intimate moments, and of course i liked the chrysalis metaphor - i mean, who can't relate to wanting to cocoon and emerge transformed into a beautiful creature - so many little gems, but at my heart, i was disappointed. as much as she touched on some very real pain, i also felt she danced around it. i knew i wasn't going to find answers here, but i was hoping to find deeper insight into the questions - and i really wanted more of her story. rather then repeatedly hearing about her pain, i wanted to ask, well, what was that pain? how did it feel? don't just tell me you had pain - tell me what that pain meant to you. another thing to mention is that somehow, in the reviews i read of this book, nowhere did it say anything about her Christian spirituality, and so, i was quite shocked when i started to realize this. i believe that we all have the right to believe in whatever we choose - i believe in my form of god - i do - but i found myself withdraw as i repeatedly read GOD, JESUS, BIBLE, CHRISTIAN - for reasons that i am just starting to understand, this stuff freaks me out. so maybe that's why i felt like i didn't get her heart - maybe it's the language that scared me - i found myself dialoguing about my feelings on religion and wondering why i was so resistant to even reading about JESUS. anyway, it was a thought provoking read, but i left this on the plane for someone else to discover.

A Gate at the Stairs by Lorrie Moore

I've tried to read Moore before (that rhymes) and had felt her writing to be quite dark, if I remember correctly. This book, however, was a smooth read - some dark, yes, but not so much that it feels overshadowed. Her writing is brilliant, and quite obscure.

"Tassie Keltjin, the daughter of a gentleman farmer, has come to a university town as a student. When at twenty she takes a job as a part-time nanny for a glamorous and mysterious family, she finds herself drawn deeper into their world and forever changed."

Rich, layered, her descriptions quite colorful and odd - I loved this book, and I only wish she had gone deeper into the characters. What seemed like unimportant persons in the book turned out to be integral to the main character. And the ending, too quick. I definitely recommend this read.

the lace reader by brunonia barry

This is another book that you gifted to me, and in the end, I loved it.
The first few pages had me wondering if it was a little hokey, but Barry is an extremely talented writer, and I was eager to open the pages and fall into the story each and every evening.

"Brunonia Barry dreamt she saw a prophecy in a piece of lace, a vision so potent she spun it into a novel. The Lace Reader retains the strange magic of a vivid dream, though Barry's portrayal of modern-day Salem, Massachusetts--with its fascinating cast of eccentrics--is reportedly spot-on. Some of its stranger residents include generations of Whitney women, with a gift for seeing the future in the lace they make. Towner Whitney, back to Salem from self-imposed exile on the West Coast, has plans for recuperation that evaporate with her great-aunt Eva's mysterious drowning. Fighting fear from a traumatic adolescence she can barely remember, Towner digs in for answers. But questions compound with the disappearance of a young woman under the thrall of a local fire-and-brimstone preacher, whose history of violence against Whitney women makes the situation personal for Towner. Her role in cop John Rafferty's investigation sparks a tentative romance. And as they scramble to avert disaster, the past that had slipped through the gaps in Towner's memory explodes into the present with a violence that capsizes her concept of truth. Readers will look back at the story in a new light, picking out the clues in this complex, lovely piece of work."

This describes it to a tee. What seems a simple story, upon reflection at the end, turns out to be quite complex. I treasured each moment with this book.

the memory palace by mira bartok

a heart wrenching, well written memoir by mira bartok, and the story of her schizophrenic and homeless mother. bartok and her sister spent seventeen years hoping that their mother would never find them - her schizophrenia caused her to obsess over both of her daughters lives - calling them fifty times a day or more, appearing unannounced at their jobs and homes, threatening them if they suggested that she get treatment for her illness and violently attacking them.

at age forty, a car accident left bartok with a debilitating brain injury - she retrained herself to draw and write, but her memories were lost to her. when she learns that her mother has terminal cancer, her sister and her decide to visit their mother before it's too late - bartok begins to connect with memories she fears were lost for good.

haunting, tragic, and deeply moving.

It has been a while since I read anything of note. I keep starting things and stopping. And I am still reading Anna Karenina which is wonderful but I read it in pieces. Demonglass is a YA read. I try to keep up with some things for that age. It was okay. Last Night at the Lobster was interesting. O'Nan is a very good writer. This is a story that takes place over the span of one night. The manager of a Red Lobster on the last night before it closes is trying to get through the last shift with a snowstorm, an ex, and a staff that is mostly going to be unemployed the next day. I feel indifferent about it. Boneshaker was a lot of fun. Sort of a steampunk zombie story. Seattle has been overtaken by a yellow fog that turns people into zombies. The survivors of the initial fog have walled off the city to keep everything in. A young mother goes in after her son and adventure ensues. Highly entertaining but not life changing. I really need to buckle down and read something great.

mourning diary by roland barthes

it has been some time since i've posted and it's been some time since i've finished a book. and so, finally, i finished reading mourning diary by roland barthes last night.

the day after his mother died, in october 1977, he began a diary of mourning. for nearly two years, he took notes on index cards and reflected on his loss.

they are a unique study of grief...snippets of thoughts and feelings, intimate, and sad.